Do you have to get married?

everyone has their reasons for why they want to get married.

or romantic, or rational, or real close to life, or almost pale.

some people say that if you love enough, get married;

some people say that you are tired, so you want to get married.

some people say that they are afraid of falling in love all the time, so they quickly get married.

some people say that they want to find someone to live a small life.

it's like the besieged city that Mr. Qian Zhongshu said. People outside want to go in, people inside want to come out.

do you want to get married? when you see that your friends are married and have children, you suddenly want to get married.

ask yourself if you want to get married, and if you think about it, you won't be so anxious about it.

because to get married, you have to meet the right person first.

what is right is the right person, is the right person, like, have common interests, love should not become a burden, two people together, each has their own life, will not be disturbed each other, but when they want to be together, that person is by his side.

get along with each other as friends, you can make fun of each other and have had fun, instead of talking in front of him and doing things trembling, and you don't have to be afraid to break up after the joke goes too far. In my opinion, this is the most suitable relationship.

however, most of the time, you are alone all the time, just that the one you like doesn't show up, and the one who appears doesn't like it.

even if you have to face questions from your parents when you come home for the Spring Festival, you are still clear-headed. You know that marriage is not about going to the vegetable market to buy vegetables. You can get married by picking and choosing casually.

so, you are still alone.

about marriage, on the one hand, it is emotional dependence and needs, on the other hand, it is sexual needs.

the latter, according to Freud, is the most instinct, the same as eating when you are hungry.

as far as marriage is concerned, the latter needs less and needs more emotional dependence.

the need for sex is easy to solve.

and it is much more difficult to find a relationship that makes you feel warm and happy in this big world.

more often, you find that living alone is very good.

have a lot of friends and live a happy life.

the joy of life is not less because you are alone.

so, you are physically and mentally at ease, comforting yourself in the tone of Ah Q:

my dream is true love and freedom. Before I found my true love, I was very free and happy.

but if you look around the world, you will find that many people live their lives on their own.

there are plenty of bachelors in your village, who do not have much wealth and are not self-motivated, and there are not many blind dates, so they live a life where one person has enough to eat and the whole family is not hungry, and there is no guarantee for their material life, let alone find someone to marry and live a small life. Think about it, no girl will choose to marry him, after all, life pays more attention to reality, why marriage is nothing more than to find someone to rely on and set up a small family.

some people are used to hanging out alone. In ancient times, the so-called Pianpian boys were unrestrained and indulgent, but those who wanted to live a comfortable life lacked a sense of security and stayed away from them, or they were just in a playful state of mind and wanted to get married, then they were really afraid.

some people have a great sense of insecurity. Except for him, they feel that the world is surrounded by traps. If they are not careful, they will fall into the trap of the bad guys. They will tremble for the rest of their lives and dare not neglect them at all. The same is true for love and marriage, for fear that love will be broken up and marriage will be divorced. As a result, they can only stand around the marriage and watch, but do not dare to set foot in it. In the end, they are alone.

there are still some people who have loved, hated, broken up, parted, and finally naturally turned into celibacy, not taking the initiative to choose, but involuntarily changing in all kinds of love life.

in fact, in my eyes, Cupid has a balance in addition to the arrow on his back, and the supply of love for everyone is equal, for example, the quota of love for all is 100. Some people, extremely lucky, meet a person in a lifetime to fall in love and then get married, live a happy life. And some people in the search for a partner on the road bumpy, each love will have wear and tear, or 50, or 20, in the end, they love less and less rationing, more and more lack of the ability to love and love.

A teacher of the undergraduate course, male, is nearly 50 years old. He is from the northeast, gentle and gentle, and his charm has definitely conquered all the girls in the class, but he is still single. Once I drank with him and listened to him talk about the past. once he was forced to get married at home, so he casually went to the bar to find a girl who was very scantily dressed and directly took her home and asked his parents, is this all right? I'll get married right away if I can. Since then, his parents have never asked about his love life, so he has been single ever since. Such a man of true temperament dares to love and hate, but in the past, he has so hurt in love that love consumed so much that in the end, he simply thought about it and lived a small life of his own.

and another graduate teacher, female, is still in her 40s and is now single. I didn't feel how boring and boring his life was. I played with the students all day and had a good time. I also took advantage of the holiday to travel with some old friends to see the outside world. If I say she has never been in love, I don't believe it, but there is no need to ask about the past. She is happy and very good now. In this world, she will not stop because of the lack of a woman next to her, nor will it be more because of the addition of a man. And colorful.

two people have their world, and one person can live his own life.

leftover women are a social problem, as are leftover men.

going home for the Spring Festival is the biggest headache for both. As a result, some people become afraid to go home.

what is more, realistic is the problem of Chinese tradition.

after all, in China, older men and women do not marry, in the past, they had to be criticized and gossiped behind their backs, but now they are somewhat open, but after all, they are not open enough. Understandably, the old people are in a hurry, but it is a bit too casual for many people to find someone to marry because of the old man's urging. Picking and picking are not terrible, but unrealistic picking and picking is a bit wild and unimaginable. You are a Cinderella, you have to find a prince on a white horse, do you think you deserve to be leftover? But in the end, it is still a practical question. Whether it is necessary to get married when you find a suitable one depends on their values and world outlook. European and American families also live together for more than ten years without getting married. If you want to get married, find a good day and get married.

if you are not in a hurry, just live like this. To inherit the family line and get married, you'd better not tie the knot. Don't end up unhappy at both ends, and love consumes too much.

when it comes to getting married, at least ask yourself a few questions.

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first, whether the other person is the one he likes and feels suitable, whether he or she can rely on each other, and it is best to get along with each other for one to five years. The longer the time is, the more shortcomings will be found in each other as the advantages found in the beginning. At that time, ask yourself whether you want to spend a lifetime with this person.

second, whether you are ready to get married, whether you can have a showdown with each other, you can have a showdown with your family, the most taboo is not long after you have just fallen in love, your eyes are blurred by the sweetness of love, and as soon as you get restless, you can't help announcing it to your friends and family and the whole world. You should know that the right one is not afraid of the test of time, slow down, then slow down;

third, whether you are ready to assume the responsibility of a family, after all, married life is different from love, one is more material reality, the other is a romantic ideal, you should consider this;

fourth, finally, ask your heart whether you want to get married.

Lin Xi once said, "A lot of people get married just to find someone to watch a movie with, not someone who can share their experience of watching a movie." If I don't want to get married just to find a partner, I can go to the movies by myself. "

so, as to whether you must get married or not, you should have your answer after watching Lin Xi.

two people may be happy, but one person can still be free and happy.