I'm just trying not to come to you.

Chapter.

"isn't the word secret love stupid?"

this is a comment from a girl I saw under a status on Weibo. I went in curiously to see the girl's home page and shared a lot of emotional bloggers' status, many of which mentioned the same name. I saw that she shared Weibo about constellations, and there were many posts about Capricorn. Capricorn like what kind of person, Capricorn how to show love for a person, Capricorn's ten traits, just browse her Weibo, that person seems to appear in front of you.

I suddenly envy the girl who says, "isn't it stupid to have secret love?" she is so timid and brave. this Weibo account, which is obviously for the Capricorn boy, records all the beautiful and simple teenage girls' thoughts.

I still remember that I used to like a person. I always resisted all expectations and impulses and tried my best not to look for him. in retrospect, I don't know what I'm afraid of, maybe I'm afraid of rejection, maybe I'm afraid of losing face, but I always guess the other person's mind with something more childish and inexplicable. silently count the flowers that "like" and "dislike" break to the last petal, and count the luck that that person will turn around in a few seconds. these ridiculous things are just to find out ten thousand possibilities that you will like me in the time you are not looking for you.

about you, it's all over my brain. I try to hide all those things, but they can slip out of my eyes. those tsunami-like emotions hidden in the bottom of my heart ferment a good smell in every time I spend alone.

Chapter 2.

A-B has been in love with a girl for a long time, and he can't remember the day when he felt differently about the girl. He dared not say, nor did he want to say it. He thought it was just a good feeling, and it would not take long for him to calm down, so he planned to put it away and try not to go to the girl.

"I dare not say it, but I am afraid that the relationship between two people will be over as soon as I say it." A B tells us. So the secret was always in his heart, hidden in every message he wanted to send. like her like her, even afraid that she knows, but also afraid that she doesn't know, even more afraid that she knows but pretends not to know. in this drama of desperately trying to hide her mind, all her responses have nothing to do with her, and all her jealousy is self-inflicted.

I have been holding back for a long time, but I don't know how to say it. doesn't seem to be a big deal, and the worst response is "I don't like you". It seems like a simple thing to think about, but it seems to be an unbearable burden for no reason, and occasionally out of breath.

Chapter 3.

when A B was trying not to look for the girl, the two met at a friend's party. The girl sat with a boy friend, chatting and laughing from time to time, while A B sat on the opposite side of them and could only stare.

the most distressing thing about secret love is that I have been in love with you for so long and almost think you are mine, but I don't even have the right to be jealous and lose my temper. standing on the edge of love and friendship, every little temptation has exhausted most of my strength. I'm afraid you won't respond, I'm afraid of your cold response, and I'm afraid of your response.

you know, how stupid it is to try not to find the one you like. You think that if you surround yourself in a safe zone, patience allows you to avoid all rejection and indifference, but when you stand next to that person, you can't even find a reason to be close to him.

you know, I like you, I like you very much.

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