What is ambiguity?

one.

when I was young, I didn't know what love was. I first realized what ambiguity is.

once there was a girl who often called me at night and accidentally talked late into the night.

I think she likes me, but none of us said anything.

finally, one day, she appeared in front of me holding another boy's hand and said, "it's a nice day today, isn't it?"

I said to myself, Yes, it's as good as the end of the world.

that night, I had a dream that I confessed my love, and she agreed. I'm a little ecstatic. I can't believe it. In the dream, she said: fool, you can pinch your face if you don't believe it. I did, and then I woke up.

later, when I reflected on this relationship, I realized that this was the legendary ambiguity.

many years later, I happened to talk to her about her past feelings, and she was a little surprised and honest:

A lot of people contact you and take the initiative to come to you, not because they like you, but because they tend to feel lonely, so they like to find people who are willing to listen to them. I'm sorry you misunderstood me.

I burst into tears.

this is even worse. You think the other person is having an affair with yourself, but you find that she doesn't even have that idea at all, only you are happy and lonely there alone.

I'm not sure she's telling the truth. But I know that ambiguity is ambiguity, and when one party has a beautiful association because of the other's words and deeds, it has already been conceived. If you don't think so, you just think the other person is thinking too much. That's at least an unintentional mistake, ambiguous.

the same is true of reality.

A lot of feelings are often because of wishful thinking, and in the end, they can't even be friends.

people also often feel sorry and say some friendship that could have been very good, but because of the other person's impulsive confession of love, they are embarrassed and unable to turn back. If one side does not respond, this friendship seems difficult to maintain. It is no wonder that some people prefer to bury their good feelings deep in their hearts and refuse to take the step of expressing their love for a long time.

II.

For the rest of my life, I saw a lot of ambiguous feelings, pondered, thought, and had my views.

what is ambiguity?

in my opinion, it can be divided into four angles: subjective and objective, active and passive.

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[subjective person]:

as in my example above, it may be more extreme, because the ability of association is so rich that it overinterprets each other's smile and eyes, thinking that the other person is interested in themselves. and have the illusion of being in love or about to fall in love.

in reality, some people are indeed naturally gentle and kind-hearted and habitually kind to others. In the eyes of one side, ordinary behavior is rare, while the other will think about it and be self-righteous.

of course, this is a minority after all. Most people are not so narcissistic that they always suspect that others fall in love with them.

[objectors]: there were often such rumors between men and women when they were students. They often appear together, study together, go to school together, and Gu Pan Shenghui is intimate when chatting. Even if they strongly deny it, they will be booed and encouraged by the masses.

this kind of ambiguous relationship is benign, and this kind of ambiguity itself is already the initial stage of a kind of love.

but it is often that although both parties like each other, it is inconvenient for some reason to go public or each other are waiting for each other to take that step. I'm anxious to go to the theatre.

in most TV dramas, the emotional tension of the hero and heroine is shown in the ambiguous relationship. As soon as they come out, they are happy that their enemies do not like to quarrel with each other, and the audience knows at a glance that they will be a couple sooner or later, but they are all hard-mouthed.

when they finally have ups and downs and fate will finally get married, the play is almost done.

the most typical is many Japanese TV dramas and animes of "pure love". For example, the famous "I want to tell you" is jokingly called "dying to kill you" by many viewers. Two leading actors and actresses who like each other in the first place can struggle with two seasons and 28 episodes.

[activist]: this is a bit awesome. They often realize from the beginning that they are ambiguous, and they also know how to be ambiguous. It's like playing a game to pass the time, it's doomed not to focus from the beginning. If they are far away, playing hard to get, they just give you a sense of closeness and then disappear without a trace in the twinkling of an eye. If you pass through a hundred flowers, a leaf will not stick to you.

Why do they do this? because they feel that life is too long and boring, and they always want to find the meaning of their existence in the eyes that others like.

but also because they know their needs clearly, so they will start this ambiguous game.

"the moment we met, I knew she wouldn't stay in my heart for long." An ambiguous expert once confessed his feelings to me.

ambiguous, but not enough love. If you don't love enough, you can hide and dabble.

many people are warm on the surface but indifferent on the inside. Just like most people say they like to read, in fact, they often open a few pages, then they no longer have the patience to read a whole book and leave it in the bookcase, occasionally in the dead of night and boredom, so they pick it up again in the process of picking and packing.

in the sea of vanity and loneliness, as long as they do not come ashore, they will not stop this undulating tide.

[passive]: you do feel the other person's unusual temptation, but when you want to get closer, the other person can turn around and leave without hesitation.

what you think is ambiguous is often a game played by that person taking advantage of your true feelings.

the more emotional you are, the more proud the other person will be.

is like a prisoner captured by the enemy, but being treated with delicious food and good drink, one day without seeing the executioner, he still cherished the hope of survival.

you have to go to the other side to make it clear to strike a knowing blow and the thunder will roar to the top.

the other person seems to give you an image of the future, but when you think about it, there seems to be no guarantee of anything.

the other person seems to give you the beauty of love, but if you take a closer look, you always seem to be nervous.

this is an emotional guerrilla war, when you want to be full of energy, the other party's dragon swings its tail; when you want to stop, the other party drums and beats.

you begin to wonder if you are in love with the wrong person, but the other person can always inadvertently stir up the softness in your heart.

your reason is gradually washed away, your pride is slowly diluted, you begin to worry about gain and loss, belittle yourself, wait for a phone call, wait for a message, wait for an accident that you have a premonition but do not want to face.

for such an ambiguous person, if you find yourself in the middle of it, I would like to say to you:

"The trouble in life is to say that yes speaks too fast and NO too slowly."

3.

if you want someone to love you, the best psychological preparation is not to make yourself love him. You should be strong and independent, seek your blessings, and make yourself the focus of your life, with sustenance, goals, brilliance, and prospects. In short, give yourself enough sources to make yourself happy, and then be prepared to accept or not accept each other's love. Roland,

once you know that you are in love with the wrong person, dare to leave, which is also a sign of mental maturity. Too many people waste too much emotion and energy on people who are not worth it, and they don't want to wake up in the end, which makes people sad and helpless.

how beautiful it is to like a person. It should bring warmth and healing, serenity and peace of mind.

and for those who like to be ambiguous, I just want to say:

"for someone who you know he likes you, but you don't like him, please remember at least to do it, don't look for him when you are lonely.

this is not only a respect for feelings but also a letting go of others. "

I hope that everyone in love can do as much as possible: do not deceive others, do not deceive themselves, and do not be deceived by others.